|
2x16 Firebomb
ABC advises us in a cryptic manner. Sloane tells Syd, "I have a swanky
limo, but let's take a Ford Focus instead." Vaughn calls the Marshall
hotline for safe specs. Marshall wants to talk about the Ford Focus; Vaughn
doesn't. Because his girlfriend is in a spot of bother, and he doesn't have
time for Car Talk. Syd tells Sloane that he's on the CIA's "free kill"
list. Oopsie, there goes the Ford Focus' resale value! Sark retrieves
Sloane and says, "Take that, Ford Focus!" The Ford Focus wonders if
getting its SAG card was worth all this. Syd yells at Kendall, because it
just feels good. Syd and Vaughn finally get that long-awaited hockey date.
Syd tells him she likes coming home with him even more than the Zamboni.
Awww. That's lurve. Because Zambonis are fun. Weiss interrupts them
on the way to the bedroom for some body-checking. Not surprisingly, Vaughn
would rather be having SpySex with Syd than meeting with Kendall. He gets
to relive the Zamboni-talk on his bug detector, which is cleverly disguised
as a cell phone. Marshall lays claim to the bug, since it sports his
special Marshall-mark. Jack is not amused. Marshall actually snarks Jack a
little! Jack? Not big with the Miss Manners. Apparently ABC could not
afford Christian Slater's salary for a second episode. Afghans do not drive
Ford Focuses. Sloane disses the world order. Kabir forgets to beware of
freaks bearing gifts. Syd does stomach crunches as EvilFrancie leers. Syd
takes off her shorts as EvilFrancie leers. Because Sloane is not around,
EvilFrancie takes up the Creepy Touching slack. Vaughn calls and saves his
girlfriend from the leers of her evil, robotic, possibly lesbian/possibly
used to be a man/possibly just freaky roommate. Kendall pays Sydney back
for yelling at him by sending her to talk to "Don't Talk to Me" Dixon.
Diane tries to play bouncer. Vaughn wants Will to dress better. Fashion
Assassin yells, "Right on!" Will likes pickles. Will says "In your face!"
to the snotty snots from the Snotty School. Kendall sends Vaughn and Syd to
Mexico City. They exchange, "Woo Hoo! Mile-High Club, here we come!"
glances. Sark frets about being at ground zero of a test run of Rambaldi's
science-fair project. Weiss saves Syd & Vaughn from being even hotter than
they already are. Any viewer who didn't at least think "Stop, drop
and roll!" is lying. Well, that was decidedly unpleasant. Our Curious Hero
and Heroine go back to check out the mysterious phantom firestorm. They
walk down the aisle under the wrong circumstances. Sark teleports to
Afghanistan in time to watch the news. Or perhaps Kabir has TiVo. Sloane
gets $40 million and a cool statue. Marshall explains it all. The mention
of taking down planes gets a big round of "Uh-ohs." Speaking of "Uh-oh,"
Weiss tells Syd they found a video transmitter in her bedroom. Syd tries to
remember the name of her first pet and street name, since she'll need a
porn-star alias. EvilFrancie shows that she did some research and
tells Syd to quit her job. Then she complains about their plumbing service.
StealthySyd goes solo to Kandahar, but unfortunately isn't very stealthy.
Vaughn decides that it's his turn to yell at Kendall. Then he begs
Dixon to help him save his SpyLove. Diane glowers. Vaughn persists. Kabir
uses Spotlight Torture on Sydney. Sloane one-ups him and uses Hair-Kissing
Torture. Kabir brings out the tray of ominous instruments he ordered from
the Menacing Villain Supply Catalog. Vaughn saves his girlfriend's
kneecaps, because they're attached to the rest of her body that he is
rather fond of. And he's brought along Dixon! Yay, Dixon! Vaughn drives the
getaway truck, because he remembers Syd's way with the Ford Focus. Jack
isn't really buying the plumber's guilt. Syd thanks Dixon for helping save
her, because she apparently didn't get around to it on the 14-hour flight
back from Afghanistan. Syd takes a bath. Vaughn is better than a lavender
bath fizzy. C'mon, Syd, there's room in that tub for two; you've seen "Bull
Durham," haven't you? Sloane gets the toy Rambaldi surprise inside Kabir's
crackerjack statue.
-- By Souris, Vartan Ho #4
|
|
