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The Fashion Assassin
Target: Reckoning
This episode brought to you by: The Eastern European Sartorial Health
Association
Supplying cardigans and hooded sweatshirts to unfortunate fashion victims
of the civil wars.
Nice body-hugging shirt Syd's wearing at the warehouse. Nicely accentuates
her 1% body fat. Girl, have a cookie. But is she wearing sneakers
with her skirt? What, was she doing her speed-walking to the warehouse
during her lunch hour from SD-6?
Francie, that lawyer should have sued you for that tie, not his
undercooked chicken.
Hey, Syd's wearing the same shirt to see Mrs. Calder that she was wearing
at the warehouse the day before. ::Gasp!:: I guess the Alias
wardrobe people just didn't have a lot of
casual/non-spandex/non-leather/non-sparkly clothes to choose from for Syd.
I don't care who's wearing 'em, golf shoes are just not stylin'. OK,
they're more stylin' than bowling shoes. But so are wide lapels. And I'm
not digging the knee socks, Syd. I am, however, digging Vaughn's "Don't
play mad" T-shirt. Hee. I wonder if MV provided that himself?
Syd has a VERY large black section in her closet. In fact, she probably has
a separate closet just for her black SD-6 outfits.
That's a very green dress Syd's got on in London. I feel as if I
just walked into a mid-'80s mall. Neon city, baby! Hmmm, suddenly I have a
craving for lime sorbet. Is that a disco ball on her finger? Dixon,
meanwhile, is apparently doing his French Hefner impersonation. Nice pout,
Syd. She practices.
Hats aren't just for wearing! They also come in handy for tossing on
security cameras. Syd, the Dodgers will be in touch. On second thought,
maybe Cirque du Soleil will be more interested.
Wow, an unglamorous disguise! I can hear the costumer's depressed wails in
the background. Or was that the male viewers? Oh, shut up, you had the
green dress.
Wig count: 0 blonde, 1 brunette, 0 redhead
--By Souris, Vartan Ho #4
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