The Safe House - Expositions

This season, with an unusually high quotient of major cliff-hangers and overdue farewells, was no exception. Taking grand prize as the most satisfying, enjoyable and popular finale was NBC's blockbuster Friends, which justified its hour length with a delightful mix of physical humor and emotional turmoil as Rachel (Jennifer Aniston) finally gave birth.

Funniest running gag: expectant couples coming and going from Rachel's semiprivate room while she labored on and on. The joke truly paid off when the infamous Janice (Maggie Wheeler) showed up, but her nagging later caused Rachel to doubt Ross's (David Schwimmer) commitment to their new baby, leading her to accept Joey's (Matt LeBlanc) accidental marriage proposal.

If Friends ended on a warm and tender note, Fox's 24 took the opposite approach, delivering the season's darkest and most disturbing climax with a cruel final image of hero Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) cradling the lifeless body of his pregnant wife, Teri (Leslie Hope), who had been shot by evil "mole"; Nina (Sarah Clarke).

Ruthless in its body count and risk-taking to the end, 24 avoided the phony, cheap uplift that a happy ending would have provided for this nightmarishly suspenseful thriller. Some may feel as if they'd embarked on a perilous roller-coaster ride only to be rewarded with a sickening splat. But this was not a show for sissies. And what a setup for next season.

Even those dismayed by the tragic fade-out had to marvel at Senator Palmer's (Dennis Haysbert) furious denouncement and dumping of his duplicitous wife, Sherry (Penny Johnson Jerald). He gets my vote.

The season's other great new spy caper, ABC's Alias, delivered a less bleak but equally nerve-racking and extravagant finale, as double-agent Sydney (Jennifer Garner) finally laid eyes on her nemesis: her long-thought-dead mother. And do we really think her lovesick CIA handler Vaughn (Michael Vartan) is dead? Not unless Alias creator J.J. Abrams is as diabolical as those 24 guys.

On the cult front, wrapping what some felt to be an overly glum season, UPN's two-hour Buffy the Vampire Slayer conclusion was a smashing return to top form, with Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) in a violent battle of wills against power-mad witch Willow (Alyson Hannigan) — with a surprise assist from newly returned Giles (Anthony Stewart Head), whose presence and wise humor had been sorely missed for months. The final blackout was a surprise knockout, with bad-boy vamp Spike (James Marsters) shrieking as his soul was restored.

On a cheerier note, CBS's Survivor: Marquesas represented a resurgence of energy, unpredictability and entertainment value compared with its last few dreary versions. On the intense final night, the votes came down to the wire several times. And while she's no Susan Hawk, bravo to Tammy Leitner for her coruscating rant against holier-than-thou finalists Vecepia Towery (the winner) and Neleh "Oh,; my heck!" Dennis.

But even the most exciting Survivor moment pales next to the adrenaline rush of the to-the-wire finish on CBS's The Amazing Race, with "Boston; Boys" Alex and Chris hoofing it past the nefarious Wil and his long-suffering partner Tara to win by mere minutes.

So much for the good news. Even loyal fans were probably disappointed in the last rites — er, nights — of Fox's former hits The X-Files and Ally McBeal.

Of the two, The X-Files was at least watchable, thanks to the reappearance of David Duchovny's irreplaceable Fox Mulder. To see him locking lips with Gillian Anderson's smoldering Scully was enough to redeem even this turgid plot: a kangaroo military murder trial in which testimony was given in an attempt to make sense of the show's tangled mythology.

But what hubris for creator Chris Carter to give us the date of the "final; alien invasion" 10 years from now, as if we'll still care. When Mulder took Scully in his arms to utter the series's last words — "Maybe; there's hope" — I could only hope the next movie will be better than this.

Nothing, however, was more painful than Ally's creepy, weepy swan song, with visitations by a dead Billy (Gil Bellows) and former pals Georgia (Courtney Thorne-Smith) and Renee (Lisa Nicole Carson) returning for the unlikely wedding of Fish (Greg Germann) and his icky bride, Liza (Christina Ricci).

For all of the boohooing over Ally relocating to New York for her worst-plot-device-in-history daughter, you'd have thought she was going more than a shuttle flight away. But we knew her real destination: oblivion. How very sad.

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